The time to raise a conscious mother had arrived. No matter how we are raised, we all grow up with narratives and stories in our heads. We all hope and wish our parents did something differently or we blame them for issues in our lives. My daughter is now four and one day she will grow up and may have many things to say to her parents about her childhood and upbringing, even though I know I attempt to be mindful and careful with her every moment of our time together. I cannot control that. However, what I can influence are small things, which eventually become the big things. If I do something wrong, I immediately accept my mistake and apologize to her. Lola was 7 weeks old when I first said sorry to her. I recall clearly that day a family member of mine thinking I was silly to apologize to a 7-week-old infant. Apologizing to your child isn’t giving in neither is it a sign of weakness. In fact, quite the opposite. It is a sign of courage, respect and accountability. It is an acknowledgment of a relationship you value deeply. It is merely being human.
At age 4.5, my daughter is becoming her own little person. We often have some tough discussions but if she is wrong, she quickly apologizes and asks me gently if I accept her apology. She apologizes to her friends if she upsets them. They say children do as you do and not as you say. Becoming a student in the university of motherhood has been the hardest and most rewarding education. It has taken me on a profound journey of discovering the strengths I didn’t know I had and the fears I didn’t know that lived deep inside of me. And, this is only just the beginning.